sadded

SHATTERED
maybe sometimes we dont really know whats exactly happening..

i dont know what can i say now.. i thought today will just be any normal day after school.. i was walking home from the train station after 45mins of journey.. the intense pull of my muscle makes me unable to walk fast. its been such a long time since i do some running. i ransacked my bag to get my keys. i felt relieved, cause i am finally home again. a place where i can sleep and rest after a tired day at school..

as i got closer to the door something caught me by surprise, theres two pair of leather shoe outside my door and my door was left ajar. at that moment, all that come through my mind was who could it be? i take more steps closer and walk into my house..

i was shocked and heart broken. speechless..

my younger brother was in handcuffs. one officer was talking to my mother and the other looking through my brother cardboard...what the hell exactly happened? i thought everything was going on fine ever since my brother is in hostel. i thought he's improving, i thought he sort it all out that he determined to be a better person... the picture that i am in makes me totally disappointed and deceived.

all i could said was, ' what happened? why you do things over and over again. iu cant seems to get enough isit?!'

he replied, 'i've fallen into my friends trap'

how many times he said he's friends do this and that not him. he was innocent. how do iu expect me to believe? i had already accepted the fact that he is no longer living with us but in hostel and i am waiting for him to come back home and stay with us. is 1 year so hard to bear? i hold back my tears... do iu know how saddening it is for a sister to see his brother handcuffed? of all the things but HANDCUFFED.

i told him off dozen of times.. i dont want to give up on him. instead, he was the one who give up on himself. what can i say.. just pray hard and hope for better?

my heart hurts..